Thank you for opening my eyes to a very real and heartfelt insight to your personal and Aunts difficulties. I had no idea about Sundowning and hope your interventions are successful. Your care for your Aunt is very heart warming...she is blessed to have you caring and advocating for her.
A close friend, also a stress head like me, gave me a yellow badge - the type of badge we used to be awarded at school. Red reads 'first' - blue 'second' and yellow 'third'. I looked at him. He looked at me. We both got it. It's hard being good enough and not best but it makes for a happier life and even has a badge of its own. Be third! Be good enough!
Thank you Denise. Small adjustments can male a huge difference in preserving their humanity and peace. I recently wrote a piece entitled, Enter his world. You might enjoy it. It is based on advice given to me by a former classmate of mine who works as a clown and caretaker for seniors with dementia.
And, speaking in front of them as if they are not there is something that particularly hurts me. We cannot know what this makes them feel. Love that you are doing your part to change things. Impossible to do this badly. 💕
I’m really glad you wrote this and it does not seem half assed at all. I relate to a lot of this, with my mom’s Alzheimer’s. Fortunately, due to her financial circumstances she can afford one on one 24/7 care. She lives in memory care now and the management there seems slightly better. But in regular assisted living, it was a nightmare. Sending you strength and hugs. This disease is a mother fucker. ❤️
Really felt this Denise. Brought back (fairly recent) memories of grappling with the care system on behalf of my parents and my aunt before they died. I don't doubt you ARE making a difference, being your aunt's advocate and also helping others in your area join the dots. But also don't doubt that it's exhausting. I sympathise.
Great writing Denise(that felt weird 😊) I concur with all that you say. In another life, I was a Sheltered Housing Manager and several of the beautiful people I cared for (not literally, they were all independent, but I lived on site, in case they had an emergency) had the beginnings of Alzheimer’s. Sometimes it was difficult to get them the care they needed. I had to liaise with my employers, family of said residents and the medical profession, it was a difficult and sometimes frustrating time and not always was the outcome what it should have been.
I truly hope so. I became friends with quite a few and I am still in contact with one lady who moved on when her husband died but we became good friends and still chat online every now and then.
Great read Denise. My dad was in a nursing home for the last few years of his life, so this really resonates. As does the message. Trying hard (because we care) is exhausting. Thanks for making this post feel universally relevant!
It's amazing how much these things can stress is, isn't it? I had to write a stressful health-related email last week and it took me a whole week and much angst and research to even send it. In the end the outcome was amazing. But yeah, I lost a week.
Thank you for opening my eyes to a very real and heartfelt insight to your personal and Aunts difficulties. I had no idea about Sundowning and hope your interventions are successful. Your care for your Aunt is very heart warming...she is blessed to have you caring and advocating for her.
Thank you Terry 💛
A close friend, also a stress head like me, gave me a yellow badge - the type of badge we used to be awarded at school. Red reads 'first' - blue 'second' and yellow 'third'. I looked at him. He looked at me. We both got it. It's hard being good enough and not best but it makes for a happier life and even has a badge of its own. Be third! Be good enough!
Thank you Denise. Small adjustments can male a huge difference in preserving their humanity and peace. I recently wrote a piece entitled, Enter his world. You might enjoy it. It is based on advice given to me by a former classmate of mine who works as a clown and caretaker for seniors with dementia.
And, speaking in front of them as if they are not there is something that particularly hurts me. We cannot know what this makes them feel. Love that you are doing your part to change things. Impossible to do this badly. 💕
Feel free to link the piece!
Here it is. https://open.substack.com/pub/dannilevy/p/entering-his-world?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=3g3t74
I’m really glad you wrote this and it does not seem half assed at all. I relate to a lot of this, with my mom’s Alzheimer’s. Fortunately, due to her financial circumstances she can afford one on one 24/7 care. She lives in memory care now and the management there seems slightly better. But in regular assisted living, it was a nightmare. Sending you strength and hugs. This disease is a mother fucker. ❤️
Thanks Alexis! Yes it is a terrible disease. I hope your mother is feeling safe and loved.
Thank you! It appears that way but she’s not able to communicate so well anymore. So I really hope so too! 🩷
Really felt this Denise. Brought back (fairly recent) memories of grappling with the care system on behalf of my parents and my aunt before they died. I don't doubt you ARE making a difference, being your aunt's advocate and also helping others in your area join the dots. But also don't doubt that it's exhausting. I sympathise.
Thanks Wendy, I hope so 🙏
Great writing Denise(that felt weird 😊) I concur with all that you say. In another life, I was a Sheltered Housing Manager and several of the beautiful people I cared for (not literally, they were all independent, but I lived on site, in case they had an emergency) had the beginnings of Alzheimer’s. Sometimes it was difficult to get them the care they needed. I had to liaise with my employers, family of said residents and the medical profession, it was a difficult and sometimes frustrating time and not always was the outcome what it should have been.
Sending care and love from Denise 😊
Thank you Denise! I can only imagine how challenging that would be, I'm sure you made a difference.
I truly hope so. I became friends with quite a few and I am still in contact with one lady who moved on when her husband died but we became good friends and still chat online every now and then.
Great read Denise. My dad was in a nursing home for the last few years of his life, so this really resonates. As does the message. Trying hard (because we care) is exhausting. Thanks for making this post feel universally relevant!
Thank you ❤️
❤️
It's amazing how much these things can stress is, isn't it? I had to write a stressful health-related email last week and it took me a whole week and much angst and research to even send it. In the end the outcome was amazing. But yeah, I lost a week.
Yes, it's something I do a lot, it's crazy.